DO I NEED A MINISTER TO MARRY ME?
In the United States, it is the public declaration of intent to be married in the presence of witnesses that makes a man and a woman legally married. Anybody can perform the marriage ceremony. You do not need a minister to marry you, as the person who marries you is not representing God or The Church, but the government. We represent the State of California. The power to marry comes from The State of California. We say: "In the presence of your family and friends, by the power that is vested in me by The State of California, I now declare that you are husband and wife!"

All marriages are a legal act, whether they are performed by a minister or not. A Marriage is an action sanctioned by The State, not the church. You are creating legal boundaries that include begetting children, setting up automatic inheritance rights, the right to be present at death and make decisions concerning death, community property rights and insurance benefits.

In many countries of the earth, marriages are still arranged and are based upon the legal aspects of a marriage. It is only in our more recent history on planet earth that we have decided that "being in love" is the reason to get married. In the ages past, a marriage was decided by a group of people, and the reason for the marriage was much more about the benefit to the community and based upon bigger and more profoundly extenuating circumstances than it is today. According to Stephanie Coontz in an article for the New York Times in July 2005, she discusses how "love" and the "pursuit of happiness" has undermined marriage and replaced the "institution of marriage" which was originally an economic and political decision. She says that it isn't gay marriage that is destroying our concepts of marriage. She says that marriage began to disintegrate with woman's rights, and birth control which took sex into the pleasure area rather than just being for reproduction.

When primitive man desired to establish a home and a family, he looked for someone to solemnize the Event.  Early in primitive man's life experiences on planet earth, he became aware of strong and weak forces that seemed to be outside of his control. Birth to him was astonishing. Sickness was very distressing
and death was a mystery and very terrifying. He was sometimes at the mercy of the wild animals. He saw weather conditions that threatened his life. Primitive man learned that he could have more power over these strong and weak forces if he made alliances with others of his own kind. Local communities sprang up and certain ones of the group or tribe became leaders.

One such leader was The Medicine Man or, person designated to try to appease and control the strong and weak forces so the homo-sapiens could feel safe and be healthy. (Later on, scientists identified these strong and weak forces - gravity, electro-magnetism, the four corners of the earth, all of the multitudes of levels of vibrations of light and sound and color, the winter, spring, summer and fall solstices, planetary and galaxial effects of the full moon and the solar system, and on and on, even today, quantum physics is still investigating these strong and weak forces - examining atoms, electrons, photons, quarks!). Many rituals and remedies of motion and sound were developed to entrain with the strong and weak forces. Tribal dancing, drumming, clapping, singing, herbal, flower and chemical remedies, light, heat, color and sound therapies, meditation, prayer, Incantations, affirmations, decrees, many different types of ritualistic traditions were created.

When primitive man desired to establish a home and a family, and needed someone to solemnize the Event, the Medicine Man would perform the ritual of Marriage for him in the presence of witnesses. The Medicine Man also kept the records of birth and death and marriage and rites of passage, in his head. This information was passed down through the generations verbally.

Down through the Ages, this person has become The Priest, The Minister, The Rabbi, The Shaman, the Person who was responsible for the spiritual or meta-physical part of the life of the homo-sapiens. They conduct the marriages, funerals, baby baptisms,
Coming-of-age rites, and other celebrations that involve sacred passages in the life of the homo-sapiens. And the Church, or Temple, or other types of religious organizations began to keep the records.

When cities and counties and countries were established, the job of keeping the records was transferred to the governments. And the act of marriage became a legal act with legal ramifications.

However, even today, in the United States, where we actually have separation of church and state, when a person thinks of getting married, they still think they have to have a "minister" or "priest" or "rabbi" to marry them. This is NOT TRUE! The act of marriage is a legal act, sanctioned by The State and not The Church.

The first people to came to the United States came from England. In England, there is just one religion, and it is the religion of the State. The United States was begun as a country where there was to be freedom to practice or not to practice a personal religion. And the religion of the people was to be separated from the government of the people. Today, in the United States, we have people coming here from all over the earth, bringing with them their own personal religions, and their own ways of celebrating the sacred rites of passage in their lives. People who come from Mexico or South America are usually Catholic. People who come from Europe are either Catholic or Protestant. People who come from the Eastern Bloc countries are mainly Buddhist, Hindu, or Muslim. People who come from the black nations of Africa and other native peoples of many different regions of the earth including The Native American Indian practice rituals that are in harmony with nature and the Great Spirit of Nature. Many of these practices are called magic or witchcraft by people who do not understand. Eastern bloc religions and native religions are much older than the Protestant or Catholic religions as they go back to the times before the great universal being, Jesus, visited the earth. And there are Jewish people all over the earth, the largest group being in the United States. In the early times of Hebrew peoples, the man took the woman into his tent in the presence of witnesses. This caused them to be married.

People call The United States a "Christian" nation. But this is far from the Truth. We are One Nation under God where there is freedom to have or not to have a personal religion, an amalgamated people, living in respect and harmony together, representing all of the cultures, the races, the religions, the creeds, the rituals of all the people of the earth. This is what makes our Country so great and so wonderful!

The presence of the witnesses actually is the presence of God at your wedding. So to say, in the presence of God and these witnesses is saying the same thing! The witnesses are the presence of God at a marriage ceremony.

When marriage ceremonies use to say, "what God has joined together, let no man put asunder," what that meant was -- when the divine in the man is attracted to the divine in the woman, that as long as no other person entered into the relationship to divide and separate the man and the woman, they would continue to be joined together. The point of this statement was a warning to everybody there to not interfere or try to divide and separate this couple from now on! Let all mothers and fathers and friends and aunts and uncles and everybody else stay out of the situation from now on! Let the couple work things out together! Let no man interfere!

The marriage ceremony is a celebration of the couple's love and commitment to one another And the public and legal union of their two lives.  The ceremony can be performed by anyone who desires for them to have a sacred and holy moment in their lives in the presence of family and friends and who has the experience to conduct the affairs of
The Wedding Day in a dignified and auspicious way.

We at www.marcyann.com  are Committed and Dedicated in our hearts to making your Wedding Day a most sacred and loving experience for all who Participate. We know how the guests are affected by attending one of our Weddings! Guests have a profound experience, they are touched in their heart and everyone goes home happier and more able to Live their lives in a better way.

WHAT ABOUT A SECOND MARRIAGE?
I like to remind couples who are divorced that if they have children from the dissolved marriage, they are still the mother and the father of the children of the dissolved marriage. Never stop being their mother and father! The child has the right to have a full-time mother and a full-time father to prepare them for their personal emancipation as an adult. It is very important for children from a first marriage to feel that they are still very important and will still have the same caring and loving support from their parent who is now marrying someone else. Having a Family-Blending-Of-The-Sands Ceremony during the Wedding Ceremony helps the children to feel secure.